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[[Deep Within Morpheus Creation]]
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[Jan. 12th, 2009|12:03 pm] |
my body is in so much pain
my whole right arm is incredibly sore... dunnos why... but i can't move it at all without pain jsut searing through it... then my abdomen is on a mission to piss me off with its constant ouchness
i don't want to go home. the house is completely trashed.... we somehow ended up having a party there, which wasn't expected or planned jsut happened...
i get off of work and chris calls and is like "did you get off yet" and he came and picked me up and told me that Jay and Randy were already at the house getting drunk and so we get there and im super quiet being me... but Randy kept giving me shots of tequila so i started to talk a bit more and got out of my corner... then Brandy and her BITCHSLUTWHORESKANK *coffcoff* friend comes over, THEN Jeff and his girl Katie come over and we jsut get smashed... 1/2 gallon vodka, 1/2 gallon tequila 2 cases of beer... we were... pretty drunk
BUT THEN!!!!!!!!!!!!
I see MY christopher going outside with THAT FUCKING BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!! and so im like... uhmmmm no.
so i go out there with them and i wait for chris to pass me the ciggarette.... but he PASSES IT TO THIS BITCH!!!! and barely says a word to me
omg i have to calm down cause im starting to get super pissed and hes gonna call me in a few minutes
but omg... i was so pissed, i straight up gave him my most evil glare and went inside and just slammed the patio door closed and didnt say a word... they say that infp's can hold it till their values are broken WELL MINE FUCKING WAS what the hell was he thinking?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!?!?
so i gave him the silent treatment all that night and all the next morning... i woke up pissed....
and in a way it was silly... she was ugly and had three kids and was known to be a slut... but STILL... that is not okay, especially since i KNOW she was flirting WITH MY MAN IN MY FUCKING HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
augh
i have anger problems...
now i don't want to talk to chris... mayb i blew it out of proportion in my head since i was drunk, but im not drunk now and its been 2 days and im still pissed
fuck thats all i can think of
and i could've sworn i saw him stand close to her.... *squints eyes*..... .................................................................................
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i played nice to her though. i said so much horrible shit in my head but to her face i was nice
im the hostess and thats what i do
jeff broke the jar of jelly and while i was cleaning it up i started crying and jay and jeff were hugging me and saying sorry they brok the jar of jelly...
but that's the last thing i wsa thinking of
it was insulting to my pride, to my feelings.... i would have had so much more fun if that fucking scene would jsut stop playing itself over and over and over and over in my head
and who am i to talk??? on haleys birthday i went and smoked a bowl with a guy i had JUST met 20 mins before
and then i played pool with another guy i hadnt met
but i didnt share a fucking ciggarette and ignored chris's exsistence..
augh im such a hypocrite
but im so mad and angry and sad and hurt and jsut aguhauosdhewguhe o gwtfkihkjndgjkh:kncjkglfkasdnvkjffhlaksmfvno;nfvjkbhfk;lfmfvkjvgf;dlkfnvdoidfjfnmasm,dbhvjk;
*hides in the shadows of the closet*
i hate being scared of being left alone forever. |
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[Jan. 12th, 2009|01:13 pm] |
okay
i've calmed down now
i reallllly have to work on that temper of mine
but to finish off....
the night was actually pretty good... i think Brandy likes me adn so does KAtie... Randy was funny as hell and we were talking shit to each other all night whihc was fun
uhm...
yep
thats all i cna think of now
i felt like i had more to say
but now its all gone and dissapeared into the void |
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| *sigh* back to my first love |
[Jan. 12th, 2009|03:27 pm] |
Which Office Moron Are You?
Rum and Monkey: jamming your photocopier one tray at a time.
I'll smoke you a kipper, because you'll be back for breakfast. You're the cult television show quoting, user account deleting, soap loathing IT Manager.
Something in your childhood has made you the way you are. You've been hired to provide a service to everyone else in the office - you make the computers run, and you make them run well. You've streamlined everything; you've removed all the viruses and installed all the firewalls. The only trouble - the only hole in your veneer of digital perfection - is the way you laugh at everyone.
If someone doesn't know UNIX, you laugh at them. If they lose their password, they laugh at them. If they visit a website using Microsoft Internet Explorer and their computer succumbs to an Internet worm, you laugh. Then you take a swig of your Coke, and with another hearty chuckle tell all your friends on IRC about the idiots you have to deal with.
Maybe it makes you feel better about yourself, although let's face it, you don't need help in that department. You're great, you. Fantastic like burning cool. If only those luddite office fools would let you play Unreal Tournament in peace.
Your Word is "Love"
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You see life as possibility to form deep connections with a few people.
Relationships are the center of your world, and you always take time to bond with those you love.
You are caring and giving. You enjoy helping those you love.
And when it comes to romantic love, you feel passionately ... even in a very long term relationship.
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You Are Doted On
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You are sweet, sensitive, and a bit anxious. You are likely to have some health problems.
It's likely that you will have four or more children... whether you use birth control or not!
You find yourself overjoyed, and you love to laugh. It's easy to make you smile.
You are a bit lazy. You sometimes don't shower or brush your teeth all day.
You are quite conservative. You are neither a flirter or a flaunter.
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Your True Sign Is Cancer
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Cozy
Moody
Romantic
Traditional
Ultra-Sensitive
Unable to Let Go
The Most Loving Ever
Intuitive and Imaginative
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